Perhaps, Maybe Magically…

Life has proven to be weird at times so today I have enough reasons to believe that miraculously you’d land here, read this, and be, once again, in my world.

Hey, You, it’s been a long time since we’ve talked, I’ll try to catch you up but I know its pointless. I also know it’s silly and pretty much impossible to wish that you’d read this, but I do. I don’t have a reason to be disappointed in you, never did.

You told me how the world always has some light, even in the darkest of times, how when everything is wrong, there has to be a right. I believed you, believed in good, believed that nothing is absolute.

No absolute pain
No absolute dark
No absolute bad
No absolute loneliness

After all these years of being away, I still hold on to your words, remembering how life once turned out, but we survived. A friend I lost everything for, a friend I thought I’ll always have, a friend I lost to someone, a friend that I’ll always miss.

I’m running low on things to hold on to, you, I’m running out of hope and happiness. You’ll never know it, you’ll not be here, but what if you did? what if, somehow, perhaps magically, you’d be here…

A friend that I could use, a friend that I desperately need, to tell me it’s alright, to show me, in absolute darkness, a hint of a light. Today, I put my faith in nothingness, I put myself out there, falling, hoping you’d catch me, again, like you once did, nine years ago.

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7 thoughts on “Perhaps, Maybe Magically…

  1. I could so easily relate to this but maybe not for an actual friend but rather an imaginary one, which would act out as a friend – just how the books told me about and stories made up my mind about what friends really are.

    It’s true I want none of my acquaintances to fulfill that roll because I will never give them enough space to look inside of me but just maybe, maybe I also need a friend who is there to help me achieve my dreams – even if someone bluntly messages me every single day a single message “there is hope” and nothing else for the entire life I think it’s pretty appreciative and encouraging for anyone who has a mind and a beating heart – I think I’m that much blessed.

    It’s all wishful thinking – true – but even someone like me deserves to think about the likes of friends which you had the pleasure to live on while closing my eyes and sensing a *sigh* as fake as it might be but just let me have my moment for its the closest I can get to what you had in real at some point.

    Happy breathing and thank you for sharing your thoughts.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Once we’ve lost something, it’s only normal to exaggerate its existence. Usually humans have a tendency of overstating the good and understating the bad of which is lost. I hope I make sense here.
      It’s similar to looking at your old pictures, if you look better than now, you would say how pathetic you used to be thought at time, you didn’t really felt that way and if you looked better before, you’d rant how you’ve lost your precious perfect self while that’s not quiet true.
      What I mean to say is, while writing, I have articulated my friend as I felt, my feelings however are subjective and based on my current situation.
      But for today, let me tell you, there’s always hope. Even if you feel otherwise, you’re only looking away, it’s never lost.

      Liked by 1 person

      • I actually had to read your comment thrice which reflects how deep it went on explaining this idea.

        Yes it’s true we are used to exaggerating the goodness in what is lost for someone said that the only time you’ll be in the good books of everyone would be at your funeral.

        Btw you should have written that if you looked better now than before – no wonder I had to read thrice.

        Hmm that’s​ fine, it’s strange how much deep of an effect words from a human can have even though it’s the same simple plain language that we use everyday but is not penned down on paper to teach us anything but purely out of heart and personal – sharing a part of our inside and just witnessing how much it can teach others is just beautiful.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. :p Reading thrice is okay if it makes sense out of my mumblings.
    The only reason why I like to read is because it shows me how I’m not alone, keeps me grounded.
    If I’m good, it’s okay, there are others, they might be better.
    If I’m happy, it’s okay, many of them are happy too.
    If I’m lonely, it’s okay, so many souls isolated in this world.
    No matter what you are, where you at, reading, of what others write and create and feel, only makes you realize how similar humans of this world are 🙂

    Like

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